Scars just make your soul more interesting

I will never be a grown-up. Sometimes I fake it well and sometimes not so well. I’ve always liked the CCR song “Someday Never Comes.” There are no grown-ups. There is never a “someday” in your life when you suddenly say “I understand” and the world starts making sense. The world only starts making sense when you start ignoring all the things that hurt you so deeply that even the scars mark you as a member of the tribe of walking wounded who survived that particular awful something. Scars just make your soul more interesting. But, being a grown-up is acting as if the scars were not there in situations where acting as if they were would only make things harder. We have to hide the scars often in order to get our needs meet in the big world of pretend adults outside. Intimacy is dropping the mask and telling where it hurts. At some point, it is necessary to stop comparing resumes and start playing show and tell with the scars any “we” will have to deal with together, when the doors are closed and no one is pretending to be a grow-up. We eternal children call this “playing for keeps.”